I have spent most of my life waiting for you. Waiting to experience and explore life with you. Waiting to meet you, see you, touch you, love you and most of all hold your hand. I have been waiting. In the many years of waiting, I’ve met a few guys who seemed to be like the man I imagined you to be, but truth be told, they weren’t you. I took some time out to fix myself up and surround myself with love so when you came you’d notice me as beautiful and filled with love. I wrote you love notes on Facebook, hoping you would see them and notice me. I prayed for you and spent time talking to God about someone only He knew existed.
I’m done waiting, I’m done talking, I’m done dreaming and I’m done writing.
You are only just a part of my dreams and plans, not yet my reality. Day and night, same thing. Reality is the life I am living now, God wills and plans. I have moved from this place of “waiting” for you to appear and journey with me. I am moving on with God’s plans and no longer my plans.
You were a part of my plans. Only God knows where and when you fit into His plans. To dream of you every day is only holding me back to what I wanted and never got; what is expected of you right now and are not here to fulfill. It’s time I let go of the dream and idea of you and just live out God’s plan for me right now, which is a dream come true everyday. If this means continuing this journey alone, then so be it. I’ve come this far with God; we can keep going on together.
If along the way we do cross paths, I hope that you are everything I imagined and more, A man after God’s own heart. And I hope I am everything you imagined me to be and what God has me to be for you. Don’t look for me here or wonder if I am coming back to the place I first prayed about you and for you. The place where I waited for you. I’ve gone to where God has me to be right now, the Promised Land. Ask Him where that is and where I am; He will show you the way.
Don’t get angry with God if you reach a place and I’m not there; I’m on the move now, pursuing my purpose. Don’t get upset if I don’t see you or notice you; I’m purposed and God-driven now. Don’t get upset with God when it takes years to find me; waiting taught me patience. Don’t lose focus on God in pursuit of me; I did that, and that’s how you first broke my heart. You never appeared.
You will eventually reach the Promised Land and that’s where I will be; not waiting, but living and loving life as God planned for me.
#DearFutureHusband notes started last year (2014) as love notes to my Future Husband. God has not brought him my way yet, but I am still believing in Him for my gift. Putting the notes on social media was a way of hopefully grabbing his attention. I was basically making conversation and in doing so, inspiring other women to empower and encourage their Future Husbands before meeting them, to see the good in a man and want the best for him. It later became a platform to inspire and encourage Future Husbands and already Husbands to be the best they can be. Some of the posts are personal and for my #DearFutureHusband and some are for #DearFutureHusbands and Husbands out there.
About The Author:
Harmony Zenande Botya is an inspirational writer from Western Cape, South Africa. She is a first year student at The Aleit Academy and aspiring Events Coordinator. She loves good books, good food, good music and being surround by people with good conversation and energy. One other thing she loves is sending words of love, encouragement and empowerment to others. Says Harmony, “God is my first and last love, desire and focus. I am who I am today because of His love, grace and blessings.”
(Author’s photo used with author’s permission)
Editor: Asa-Mari Thompson
Photo credit: google images